Germany

From Heterodontosaurus Balls

“”Your mouth is filled with måny objeks of krunching and destruncktion
— Weird funny German guy who doesn't understand English sayings

Germany has a lot of 🦠 germs is a hard-working and honest character. He is economically strong, hence the nickname “Germoney”. He is also a founding figure of the European Union, giving monies and trying to keep everyone together. All this work usually makes him stressful, so he drinks a lot of beer. 🍺

Germany is the third largest refugee holder as of 2024, holding 2.5 million of them. But almost half of Germans believe that they are no longer welcome.

Geschichte (History)

Germany was divided during the Cold War, the west side was free and capitalist while the east side was totalitarian and communist. The two parts were divided by a wall known as the “Berlin Wall”. Because of the East’s brutal communist rule, people began to protest and eventually the government gave up, letting people smash and tear the wall apart. Finally, the East and the West were united in one Germany.

Following the unification in 1990, Germany faced the significant challenge of integrating the two vastly different economic and social systems of East and West. He embarked on a massive reconstruction and development program, particularly in the former East Germany, to address economic disparities and modernize infrastructure. Germany invested over two trillion marks in the rehabilitation of the former East Germany, helping it to transition to a market economy and cleaning up the environmental degradation. By 2011 the results were mixed, with slow economic development in the East, in sharp contrast to the rapid economic growth in both west and southern Germany.

Over the years, Germany emerged as a leading economic powerhouse in Europe, driven by his robust industrial base, technological innovation, and a commitment to the European Union. Germany also played a crucial role in European politics, advocating for unity and stability within the EU. Socially, Germany dealt with issues such as immigration, demographic changes, and the rise of Right-Wing Populism due to woke mishandlings, but he remained committed to democratic values and human rights.

Germany also sent a peacekeeping force to secure stability in the Balkans and sent German troops to Afghanistan as part of a NATO effort to provide security in that country after the ousting of the Taliban. While apologizing for WWII, Germany built a stable economy and a stable relation with most of Europe. He now is the most popular figure in Europe. He also became powerful, but he only uses his power for good.

Germany has opened up his borders to migrants, but is facing consequences. Migrants are now causing havoc in the country. In 2023, foreigners make up 15% of the population in Germany but accounted for 41% of violent crime suspects, with 75% of the victims being German. Germany is also experiencing lots of flooding. 🌊

Etymologie (Etymology)

The English word Germany derives from the Latin word "Germania", which came into use after Julius Caesar adopted it for the peoples east of the Rhine. The German term Deutschland, originally diutisciu land ('the German lands'), is derived from deutsch (cf. Dutch), descended from Old High German diutisc 'of the people' (from diot or diota 'people'), originally used to distinguish the language of the common people from Latin and its Romance descendants.

ẞeziehungen (Relations)

Freunde/Freundinnen (Friends)

  • Frankreich - MEIN WORST ENEMY!! Mein spouse, we gave birth to EU. I love du. (starts doing a very gross kiss) We both come from Frankish Empire.[1]
  • Vereinigtes Königreich - Friendly rival. He does not really want to interfere in our family issues with Francë hence he stayed out of our Eurozone, though wir always willkommen him in der europäischen familie. (Please make up your mind aßout ẞrexit!) Wir also love to drink ßier.
  • Österreich - Little sißling. Mein ßester freund (also the guy who got me into ßoth World Wars). Alpine version of me.
  • Europäische Union - Mein proud child. Inherited France's ßeautiful sophisticated culture, Belgium's capital and mein efficient super science, the ßest of three worlds possessing all of our genius. Also wants Ukraine as his birthday present. Ich am still teaching them mein superior military tactics- so far they have scored a 100% grade on most Russian Invasion training scenarios. Ich ßin proud - are strönk. But yuo banned mich freund's palm oil for no reason.
  • Israel - PLEASE FORGIVE ME ICH BIN SO SORRY!!!
    • Ok, it’s alright. Just pay me war funds
  • Italien - We are allies now, but historically why did yuo always of hates me? You am lazy and debts, do betrays me in war, and is not pay loan. What am do to deserve this?

Neutral

  • Griech - Yuo need to pay ze deßt.
    • NO, I’M NOT GOING TO PAY THIS
  • Botswana - Why turn me to road!? Please stop give me 🐘 Elefanten plox!
  • Islam - I is allow yuo to be in mich clay, BUT WHY YUO PROTEST AGAINST CELEBRATING CHRISTMAS?! IT’S OUR TRADITION!! THIS IS NOT YOUR COUNTRY AND YUO SHOULD BE THANKFUL I EVEN LET YUO IMMIGRANTS IN! And mein stupiß politicians still won’t do anything!!
  • Muslims - I allowed lots of you in, but now I feel like there’s too many of you demanding sharia law…

Feinde (Enemies)

  • Russland - NEIN NEIN NEIN! STOP INAVDING Ukraine IMMEDIETLY! But ich am not going to invade yuo again, ich habe changed.
  • Nordkorea - Stop the nuclear threats! Or face destruktion!
  • Nazi Deutschland - MEIN WORST FATHER EVER!!!
  • Brasilien (in football) - ÖH, JAAAAAAAAA!!!!! ICH ßEATED YUO IN FOOTBALL GAME, CRY ABOUT IT!!! this is only war crime ich not sorry about
  • Taiwan - STOP SHOWING NAZI SYMBOLS AND TAKE INSPIRATIONS FROM NAZISTS OR ICH WILL SANCTION YOU.
  • Serbien - Ich hasse du, Russian puppet!

Wissenswertes (Trivia)

  • There are more than 20,000 castles in Germany. 🏰
  • German is the third most widely taught language in the world.
  • Germany has been called the “Land of Poets and Thinkers.”

Wie Man Zeichnet (How to draw)

Flag of Germany

Germany has a drawing rating of easy.

  1. Draw a ball.
  2. Fill the ball with three horizontal stripes of color top-to-bottom in the following order: black, red, yellow.
  3. Add the eyes and you are done!
  4. Add a bottle of beer and/or glasses (optional)
  5. Add a working tool (optional)
Color Name HEX
Black #000000
Red #DD0000
Yellow #FFCE00

Galerie (Gallery)

  • gernamy

    gernamy

  • Wörk

    Wörk

  • amogus no visor real!!!!!

    amogus no visor real!!!!!

  • Map of Germany

    Map of Germany

Notes

  1. ↑ Cousin marriage is illegal in many places nowadays. Though they are very far cousins, since East Francia and West Francia can be interpreted as the great-great-great forefathers of these two. Still, East Francia is Germanic and West Francia is romantic.

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