Union of Soviet Socialist Republics

From Heterodontosaurus Balls

A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic.
Joseph Stalin

I am the man who arranges the blocks, that continue to fall from up above! The food on your plate, now belongs to the state, a collective regime of peace and love. I have no choice, in arranging the blocks, under Bolsheviks rule what they say goes! The rule of the game, is that we all are the same, and my blocks must create unbroken rows! Long love Stalin, he loves you… Sing these words, or you know what he’ll do!
Complete History of the Soviet Union, Arranged to the Melody of Tetris

Union of Soviet Socialist Republics (USSR), more commonly known as the Soviet Union, was a communist regime that spanned across Eurasia. He was a global superpower, and was also extremely un-free. He wouldn’t hesitate to commit genocide or murder his closest ranks if they slightly disagree with him. He also hates religions, believing that there is no god except for him. The Soviet Union also has almost no acknowledgement for human life, viewing them simply as objects or threats that are easily disposable. The Soviet Union also produces a lot of resources, but almost none goes to their own people.

Being the first ever communist state, he embodies the entire stereotype of communism. Even today, many people associate Russians with communism.

History

Beginnings

In WWI, Germany wanted to remove Russia from the battlefield. So they sent Vladimir Lenin to Russia to cause more turmoil. Lenin overthrew the Russian Republic, establishing the RSFSR. The first election was held, and Lenin’s party lost. He immediately declared the elected party as an “enemy of the people”, and overthrew the democratic government by force. This was the origin of all violent communist movements, and the countless catastrophes that followed.

In 1929, USSR wanted to make a new week system, because he thought people weren’t working enough and didn’t like them having Sundays off. The Soviet leadership also hated everything religious. His “Soviet Calendar” originally had 5 days in a week plus six weeks in a month. This was later changed to 6 days a week. But it was changed back to the regular 7 day week in 1940 cause it’s stupid.

Suppression

The RSFSR proceeded to take over places like the Baltics and Ukraine, creating the Soviet Union.

The Soviets began to seize grain, potatoes and other foods from good-farming places, causing severe famine in Ukraine and Kazakhstan. Millions of lives were lost.

Joseph Stalin created a system called the GULAG (Glavnoye Upravleniye LAGerey), or Main Camp Administration. This is a system of concentration camps were prisoners do harsh forced labor. If anyone slightly disagrees with the state, he or she will be sent to a gulags. Gulags are common among the cold region of Siberia. The survival rate in a gulag is around 30-50%. The Soviet government claims 1.6 million people have perished in gulags, though the real numbers could be way higher. The gulag lasted from 1918 to 1953, and at least 14 million people have been imprisoned in them. The gulags were the inspiration for the concentration camps in Nazi Germany. Today, the gulag is a symbol of communist oppression.

World War II and the Cold War

Meanwhile, in 1938, Soviet Union had some skirmishes with Imperial Japan's expansion into Manchuria, resulting in a non-aggression pact that year.

Main article: World Wars in the Soviet Union
In 1939, Nazi Germany and the Soviets signed a non-aggression pact, and preceded to invade and split up Poland, starting WWII. Germany later broke the pact and invaded USSR, and got pretty far until the winter came and pushed the Nazi forces back to Germany.

After WWII, USA and USSR became nuclear superpowers and are now against each other. The Soviets made puppet states out of most of Eastern Europe. The Soviets engaged in multiple proxy wars, supporting the communist side. In the Korean and Vietnam wars, the Soviets gave a lot of support to North Korea and North Vietnam. USSR was also competing with USA in technology. USSR sent a lot of spies to America to spy on their technology and also try to spread communist influence from within (which worked far better than the Soviets expected). In the Space Race, the Soviets sent the first satellite and first man into space. In 1957, the Soviets captured a stray dog named Laika, and launched her into space in a rocket to orbit Earth, making her the first dog that was in space and the first animal in orbit. This experiment was meant to be one-way so their was no things that could bring Laika back, so she unfortunately died of overheating a few hours into orbit.

Collapse

The collapse of the Soviet Union, a momentous event of the 20th century, wasn't a sudden one. It was a culmination of several factors that chipped away at the foundation of the communist state over a period of time. The Soviet economy, heavily reliant on centralized planning and state control, had stagnated for years. Shortages of consumer goods were common, and a black market thrived. Reforms like Perestroika, meant to revitalize the economy, had mixed results and even led to inflation. These attempted “reforms” also triggered the Sino-Soviet split, as Maoist China saw the reforms as traitorous capitalist acts.

USSR’s puppet states like Poland also broke away from communism, reducing Soviet influence significantly.

The USSR was a multi-ethnic state, with many distinct nationalities within its borders. This rise in nationalism threatened the Soviet state. In August 1991, a group of hard-line communist officials attempted a coup to overthrow Gorbachev, the last leader of the Soviets. The coup failed, but it further exposed the weakness of the central government and emboldened the independence movements in the republics.

A McDonalds store, the greatest symbol of American capitalism, was opened in downtown Moscow in 1990. People formed huge lines all around the block. This was American influence right in the heart of the Soviet Union, this was a sign that the Cold War was over. This was a sign that America has won.

These factors all came to a head in late 1991. By December, several republics had declared independence, and the remaining Soviet republics dissolved the Soviet Union itself. The USSR officially ceased to exist on December 26, 1991 (see “Succeeded by” section in the infobox).

Culture

USSR destroyed Russia’s culture and replaced it with Soviet propaganda. Soviet “culture” usually include faces of communist leaders in red and white, people holding hammers and sickles, and stars.

Relations

Friends

  • China - Best friend! I supported you since the beginning! Soviet and China, two biggest communist states! Together, we are undefeatable! We shall revolutionize the world and free all from slavery! XAXAXAXAXXAXAXAXAXAXAXAXA!! Wait, why you call me a traitor to communism? I thought we were friends…
  • Warsaw Pact - My alliance! We will remove those capitalist pigs!
  • Cuba - Take my nukes and smash that pig!
  • Vietnam - Thank you for removing Burger comrade, he deserved it! Today you have been doing really well with a fast-growing growth economy, high GDP, pulsating energy, and the best open economy only because yuo started to implement capitalism! Seems that Communism hasn't failed for those in need![1]

Enemies

  • GREEDY SPOILED PIG - OH, SO YOU ARE OF THE WORST CAPITALIST! YOU ARE OF THE KING OF CAPITALISM! THE POOR MUST OVERTHROW YOU![2] YOU ARE A FREAKING CONSERVATIVE COUNTRY THAT HATES THE POOR! pls gib mcdonal YOU AND YOUR STINKING PUPPETS! YOU ARE THE ONLY THING STANDING BETWEEN ME AND WORLD DOMINATION A COMMUNIST UTOPIA. AND YOU KNOW THAT.
  • Nazi Germany - We made an alliance and YOU BETRAYED ME. WELL, NOW I WILL DESTROY, EVERYTHING YOU HAVE CREATED!
  • China (after Sino-Soviet Split) - You are stupid Stalin's friend! Also diehard! So you must be removed as a part of my anti-Stalin campaign! 'REMOVE!
  • Religions - GULAG, NOW! OUR GLORIOUS LEADERS ARE THE ONLY GODS!

Trivia

  • USSR was the first country that can into space.

How to draw

Flag of USSR
  1. Draw a ball.
  2. Fill it with red.
  3. Draw the emblem of the sickle and hammer in the top left of the ball in yellow.
  4. Draw the eyes and you are done!
  5. Draw a ushanka or general's hat with the communist star or hammer and sickle on it (optional)
Color Name HEX
Red #CD0000
Yellow #FFD700

Gallery

Variants

Notes

  1. Economically capitalist hohohoho
  2. Says the one who literally shoots homeless people on the streets for “making the country look bad”.