United Kingdom

“”This blessed plot, this earth, this realm, this England.

— William Shakespeare

United Kingdom (UK), sometimes referred to as Britain, officially the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, is an island Western democracy and ceremonial monarchy located in north-west Europe. He is a gentlemen, and almost always wear a top hat and a monocle. His favourite thing in the whole wide world is tea. He could be stereotyped as barbaric too, with rotten teeth and a knife for stabbing people in the rainy streets of London.

The United Kingdom is made up of three constituent countries in Great Britain: England, Scotland, and Wales, plus one province in Ireland: Northern Ireland. The UK also owns some Crown Dependencies such as Isle of Man and oversees territories such as Gibraltar.

Britain is often seen as a crumbling old man wishing to live in his past. UK used to be a global superpower, now reduced to just a continental power. But despite this, the UK still runs an organization composing of almost all his former colonies, called the Commonwealth of Nations.

UK's food is trash, ridiculous and disgusting, despite himself having colonized many places with delicious cuisine and spices.

History

After Ireland gained independence in 1922, United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland reformed into the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.

World War II: the Greater War

In 1939, Germany rose up again. When Germany invaded UK's ally Poland, UK declared war on Germany, but his efforts were too little too late. UK didn't want to fight another Great War, but Churchill know that they had to fight again or Germany will take over everything. Still, little actual fighting occurred between the two until France got invaded and occupied in 1940; Free France fled to Britain. Germany switched tactics and conducted air raids that bombed British cities at night throughout 1940 and 1941, hoping Britain would surrender. Britain ordered all his citizens to turn off the lights at night so Germany would have a harder time hitting targets. Britain, with the help of Canada, fought back with their planes in what's known as the Battle of Britain. Germany was unable to break Britain's air defenses and gave up on the large scale air raids in 1941.

The United Kingdom and his dominions faught the Axis across the world, including Japan, who was also on a rampage. In 1945, Germany finally surrendered, finally ending the war. British colonies in Southeast Asia and the South Pacific have been restored after Japan surrendered soon after.

After the Wars

UK was broke after WWII. He tried but soon gave up trying to take land in the Middle East. He left the place in 1948 after realizing that promising the same land to two different groups of people with cultural, racial and religious differences was a bad idea and decided to leave the United Nations to deal with the Holy Land. A new era of war was looming over the horizon, a Cold War. With USA and USSR both now possessing weapons of mass destruction, Britain was no longer a true superpower, however still assisting America such as by becoming a founding member of NATO in 1949. Instead of fighting costly colonial wars like before, he let his colonies go. Day by day, his empire shrunk.

In 1973, UK joined the European Economic Community alongside Ireland and Denmark, which would become the European Union in the future.

By 1989, as the Iron Curtain fell, UK had become a "modern" state—advanced in technology yet retaining his culture. During the 1990s, the economy became unstable, and Scotland, Northern Ireland, and Wales each received their own parliaments. At last, in 1997, British Hong Kong was handed back to a now communist China. The sun had finally set on the British Empire.

New Millennium

UK was officially involved in the Second Gulf War coalition in 2003, and he fought in Iraq, Afghanistan, and Syria between 2003 and 2015. Britain is no longer quite as powerful as he used to be (though still proving that size isn't everything). Still, after the 2005 Islamist terrorist attacks left him reeling, UK now has one of the best security systems in the world and is one of the world's most advanced nations.

In 2009, numerous British MPs were exposed for using taxpayer money to cover personal expenses.

In 2014, there was a Scottish independence referendum vote which the results were 55.30% for no independence and 44.70% for yes. On 24 June 2016, UK announced that he would leave European Union, as he disliked being told what to do. UK officially left on 31 January 2020 at 3:00 P.M. PST, known as the "Brexit". Also in 2020, UK got infected by COVID-19.

Since Kier Starmer took power in 2024, UK has become something akin to an authoritarian dystopia. Islamist migrants flooded in and are damaging the country severly, but facing little to no punishments. Muslim rape gangs faces almost no charges and are allowed to roam free in the UK because the government wants to appear more " culturally diverse", putting women in grave danger. On the other hand, posting right-wing and government/policy-criticizing memes on the internet, defending yourself, or eating bacon could get you arrested and land you long sentences in prison, UK has given up on free speech. Realizing the fact that he couldn't win the next elections due to how unpopular he had become, Starmer cancelled the elections.

In June 2025, UK sent his patrol vassal HMS Spey to the Taiwan Strait to protect Taiwan and monitor Chinese water drills involving driving warships into other nation's boundaries.

In August 2025, UK passed the Online Safety Act, requiring age verification on all social platforms by sending in personal data, and potentially revealing the identities of anonymous users from sites such as Wikipedia and 4chan, despite those websites not being located in the UK. Some have accused UK of being an authoritarian a*shole and censoring the Internet.

Trivia

• A third of Brits drinks for than 3 cups of tea a day!
• There is a special meatball dish in Britain called "faggot".
• Big Ben is not the clock, but the bell inside it. It rings every 15 minutes, and one can hear it from five miles.
• In the 20th century, Britain kind of stopped improving his sewage system. Rainwater and sewage waste go into the same pipe and mix together, so when it rains heavily it spills into rivers. This caused 86% of rivers in UK to be rated "not good".

The Bri'ish Accent

The stereotypical "British accent" is a term often used by non-Britons to refer to the way English is spoken in the United Kingdom. It is often used in memes as a harmless mockery against British people. Here we will explain some of the features of the British accent.

Words like "bath" and "glass" are pronounced with a long "a" (like "barth" and "glahss"). The "t" and "f" sound is usually skipped, for example: "Bottle of Water" = “bo'ohw'o'wo'er”. Words like "soccer ball" and "chips" are different (like "football" and "crisps").

The British are also stereotyped into overcomplicating everything in a sentence and adding a lot of fancy words ("truth or dare" turns into "authentic factual response or mischievous challenge").

Relationships

Chaps

• Portugal - My oldest ally and bestest mate, since 1386! Though we don't talk a lot with each other nowadays, on rare occasions, we may still get together to play a football game and drink in a pub.
• United States of America - My rebellious son, you hated my 🏳️ taxes so much so you gain independence from me. But we are now good allies, seems that the tables have turned quite a bit eh, now I'm in your empire. I'm proud of you son! But, stop removing letters from the English language and calling me wrong, I literally invented it.
• France - DISGUSTING FROG EATER!!! UNCIVILIZED BARBARIC CREATURE!!!!! Former rival, but we're friends now.
• Canada - He is the good child, loyally following the crown and always being happy to help when I need him. Unlike his rebellious brother, America, who revolted against me, he opted for independence peacefully. Sincere thanks for expelling four of Russia's spies!
• Germany - Another great European power. Good chap!
• Hong Kong - One of the finest children I ever raised. I looked after him from the time when Qing Dynasty began to crumble and fall apart from the opium, up until that dirty little commie snatched him away from me. I spend a lot of time mourning for him and his harsh fate under PRC's rule. And I must say, I do adore your lovely milk tea, my dear.
• Elizabeth II - My best queen, loved by everyone in the world. Rest in peace. SHE LEFT HER IMMORTALITY SOMEWHERE, IN ONE PIECE

Frenemies

• Poland - My plumber who works for the toilet and falls asleep easily, NOW GET BACK TO WORK
• Ireland - We've tried to make amends, but he still kind of hates me. He told me he put a special gift for me in my car…

Enemies

• European Union - Utterly useless union, I'm off before you lot collapse in on yourselves.
• Argentina - NOW, LISTEN HERE, YOU BLOODY C*NT, we've already fixed our international relations, so STOP CLAIMING THE FALKLANDS! REMEMBER 1982! You weren't even bothered when I got those islands at the year 1833! SO STOP CLAIMING THE FALKLANDS AS YOURS NOW!
• China - GOOD HEAVENS! FREE HONG KONG NOW! STOP THE OPPRESSION! Also remove all your Fall Guys ripoff games.
  • NO YUO NEED TO STOP BRAINWASHING HIM
  • Brainwashing, is it? Look who's talking!
• North Korea - Fat Kim, everyone hates him.
• Pakistan - Please control your immigrants, they are destroying everything and harming our people… I can't do anything about it because I would get arrested.

How to draw

Flag of UK

United Kingdom has a drawing rating of intermediate.

1. Draw a ball and will it with blue.
2. Draw a white cross like this: (--|--)
3. Draw another white cross like this: (><)
4. Repeat steps 2 and 3, but with fewer wide lines and in red.
5. Draw the eyes.
6. Draw a black top hat and you're finished!
7. Draw a monocle and/or cane (optional)

Color Name		HEX
	Blue	#012169
	Red	#C8102E
	White	#FFFFFF

Gallery

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  HUH?
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  On Magma’s Art Jam
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  👌
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  WW1 time
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  This drawing might be turned into a secret article "World Wars in the United Kingdom"
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  Will be put into the "British Empire" page once created
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See Also

• United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland